Diary of an Honest Naturalista: Week 49

I’m so excited. Dimeji is going on his annual leave, and actually embarking on a trip to the states. One would have thought I am this excited because we are going together. But considering the fact that I am still serving, i.e. corpers are not supposed to travel out while serving, and most importantly, I don’t have money to travel out, or even a visa to do that (I have never travelled outside Nigeria before), I am the least qualified person to actually travel out right now.

Ever since Dimeji told me his plans for his 2-week annual leave, I had been drumming the fact that I want him to get some things for me, into his ears.

Our regular conversations go thus.

“Ehn ehn, Dimijei, don’t forget you would be getting some things for me when you travel o.” I start.

“Madam, I can never forget. You drum it into my ears every hour.”

“Okay, I am just reminding you, before you start giving me stories of how it skipped your mind.”

Shaking his head “How is it possible that I would go and vacation, and would not even get one thing for my baby? How?”

“One thing? Who is talking about one thing here?”

At this point, he has a confused look.

I continue. “Me, I’m sha saying my own o.”

Yesterday night was the last time I saw him. He would be leaving this night. So we were all cozy and mushy in his car, professing how much we would miss each other, and lamenting about the fact that this is the first time we would be in different countries, since we have been together. It was in this spirit of mushiness that I started.

“So, about the stuffs I said you would get me.”

“Annnaaa, I said I’ve heard. I would get something. Please, don’t dampen this mood.”

“See this Oga o. Who is talking about that? I am not saying you should get me something or anything. This is what I want.” And with that, I brought out a list.

“You have a list?” He exclaimed. “Is this a traditional wedding list or what? Are we getting married?” He started being mischievous.

“Stop jo. It’s not a big deal.” I defended myself.

He turned on the light in his car, and scanned the list.

“Whaaatttt? Nineteen items. Only you? For what? This is insane!” He was almost screaming in my ears.

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“Stop shouting.” I hushed. “You want everyone passing by to think I’m raping you? You know all these natural hair products are hard to find in Nigeria.”

“Whaaattttt?” He screamed some more. “These are all natural hair products? What do you need them for? Anna, I swear you have gone insane with this natural hair thing.”

“Stop shouting.” I pinched him this time. “You don’t understand. This is my opportunity to get all the hair products I have been dying to get. They can’t be found in Nigeria.” I defended.

He looked at me suspiciously. “So how many thousands of dollars do all these cost?”

“They are actually very affordable.”

“How much exactly if ‘affordable’?”

“I don’t know exactly how much, but they are.”

“You this girl, you are very weird, you know? You did not ask me to buy clothes, shoes, gadgets, or anything. Nineteen hair products… every single thing on this list has to do with your hair! You are obsessed.”

“I can get all the things you mentioned in Nigeria, but not these products.”

His eyes were still focused on the list. “What are these weird things, bananas, crabs…? I don’t think I’m up for all these.”

Upon knowing Dimeji was travelling, I had gone online to get a list of items I desired. It is not that I wasn’t doing fine without them, but I couldn’t afford to let this opportunity go. I listed Talia Waajid, carols daughter, shea moisture, TGIN, banana clips, hair crabs, etc.

“Just get them. They are common things in beauty stores.”

“Madam, all I know is I am travelling, and whatever I get, just be content with it.” He put the list in the dashboard.

I drew close to me, hugged him very tight, threw a parting romantic kiss into the mix, as I opened the dashboard with my right hand, extracted the list, and stuffed it into his breast pocket.

He smiled. The message had been sent loud and clear. Let’s see how effective it would be.



P.S: There's no need to send friends or admirers on stressful errands, to get natural hair products for you outside Nigeria. We actually have great natural hair products in Nigeria. Many of the can be found by clicking here.

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