Diary of an Honest Naturalista: Week 139


I don’t know if other people feel the way I’m currently feeling. I just feel like my relationship is not progressing. There’s nothing wrong with it. It is not bad, it is not good, it is not going forward, neither is it going backward. It is just there… stagnant! I hope that it doesn’t become stagnant that it begins to stink very soon.

I honestly am not sure about Dimeji’s plans for now. From time to time, I’ve thought about it, and I always pretend not to care, but deep down, I know I do. Some might argue that I am not that old at my current age of 27, but I feel that a relationship of about 2 years should have a definite direction.

Financially, Dimeji is okay (average), he is a cool guy, I have met his parents and siblings, and he has met mine. There’s nothing secretive about the relationship, the relationship seems really healthy, so I am honestly baffled as to why it just seems like routine.

I heard it’s not good for a lady to be the first to talk about marriage with a guy so it doesn’t seem like one is pressuring him before he is ready. We do the general future talk about kids, dreams, goals, career compatibility, finances, etc. but no definite marriage plans.

So here I am wondering when this proposal would come, if I would ever get this proposal, and if yes, would I have to wait for 5 more years? It is very tricky because during confusing times, I run to my best friend to bounce ideas off him, and that is Dimeji, the culprit in this case. Of course, Yemisi is not the best person to run for advice in cases like this. I mean, her engagement lasted for three whole years before they moved on, and she didn’t lift a finger to do anything about it.

I don’t know what to do. I don’t know if I should broach the topic with him directly or if it would sound somehow. Maybe I should just keep quiet and trust that he has everything under control since our relationship is okay. I don’t even know. Maybe I’m anxious for nothing. Or maybe…

Le Sigh
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13 comments

  1. Bee of Glamlushhair1 February 2016 at 16:30

    Ayayai that critical moment in a relationship. Anna don't ask him. Give it some time, and don't over-think it.. When he actually does propose, you'll come back with more wahala about wedding hair and preparations stress hehehe. Try and enjoy the moment for a bit.

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    Replies
    1. Berry Dakara2 February 2016 at 07:01

      It depends on how long you've been dating, but I would certainly bring it up lightly - "Honey, so where do you see our relationship in the future?"

      Berry Dakara Blog

      Delete
    2. African Naturalistas5 February 2016 at 13:45

      @Bee: Every phase has its own woes, right? Lol

      @Berry: What if he dodges the question? Remember they always talk about the future.

      Delete
    3. Bee of Glamlushhair5 February 2016 at 16:00

      I think the fact that the general future talk has come up means he has an end goal of marriage in mind Berry.

      @Atilola yeah what if he DOES dodge the question if she asks..Gosh can't wait for the next posts..

      Delete
  2. Urban Mnguni1 February 2016 at 21:31

    keep quiet? yes But do nothing? lies honey! As my mother would say, you better give that man motivation to get his ducks in a row and put a ring on it. I Don't know if a 20 year old could be of any assistance but if i wear in your shoes, i woul buy some of the hottest lingerie to ever exist, go do a boudoir photo shoot, print one or two of them and 'accidentally' leave them lying around in a big envelope clearly marked 'PRIVATE' with one of the pictures juuuust hanging out so he can see them.
    He WILL ask about the lingerie and you tell him you love him but some things you wanna reserve for your husband. . . .At least thats my evil diabolical scheme that I plan on using. . .

    Mvumikazi Urban Mnguni

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    Replies
    1. African Naturalistas5 February 2016 at 13:47

      Looollll at your diabolical scheme. I doubt sex or being sexy causes men to propose nowadays. It's much more than that.

      Delete
    2. Chidiebere18 February 2016 at 09:58

      Hahahahahahahahahahaha @diabolical scheme . very evil scheme oo..

      Delete
  3. Naija girl next door1 February 2016 at 23:31

    What Bee said.
    Once you get engaged and then married, you'll never again be here- single and unhindered by marital and motherhood responsibilities. You can get home, kick off your shoes and fall asleep facedown. You can go anywhere you like and report later. Moving forward comes with its fair share of encumbrances. Enjoy the moment. It's probably your last chance :p :p

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. African Naturalistas5 February 2016 at 13:49

      You have just stated the numerous reasons why I love being single.

      Delete
  4. KinkChic13 February 2016 at 09:06

    The comments are so on point

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  5. Unknown13 February 2016 at 11:22

    Anna,such is life. Why not try being happy, look for things you both enjoy doing and try to spice up the relationship.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. African Naturalistas13 February 2016 at 16:16

      I guess the next edition has opened our eyes to how Anna chose to spice it up. Lol.

      Delete
    2. Chidiebere17 February 2016 at 13:38

      asin ehnn.. it just took a different turn

      Delete

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