Diary of an Honest Naturalista: Week 124


Yesterday was my nephew’s naming ceremony. It was the ‘funnest’ family party I have attended in a while.

His name is David, and he looks just like his Aunty, Anna. Lol.

His hair is growing out pretty fast, and I believe he will have a full blown afro in the next two months. He is so cute that I could kiss him all day.

I am already taking applications for girlfriends and wife. So I will be telling my pregnant and about-to-be-pregnant friends to start submitting their proposals. These are the basic things all applicants must have before they can enter their newly-born daughters for the post of David’s girlfriend.

Your daughter must be cute. We are not ready to take chances. Cute + cute = you can guess the answer

Your daughter must have swags. See point above. Cuteness without swags is really dulling, and we can't stand it.

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Your daughter must have a high degree of self-esteem, but must not in turn, be overconfident or too full of herself.

Your daughter must be comfortable in her own skin. Literally, her natural skin and natural hair must be good enough for her to embrace.

You must teach you daughter how to maintain natural hair. This means you as a mother must be adept at that subject matter.

Your daughter must have no issues sitting down to weave her boyfriend’s hair, and must be ready to marry a guy with an afro or a woven hair.

Whether she can cook, wash, or maintain the house, I really don’t care. That will strictly be between her and David in 21 years’ time. As for me, before you apply, the above skills must be in place.

And in case you or your daughter or future daughter don’t have those skills yet, don’t worry, you still have five years to apply, as application closes October 2020. May the best and cutest applicant win.

So who can tell that the birth of my nephew is still tripping me?

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19 comments

  1. Na u born pikin. Ahan see aplication, even some grown people can fill. Lol till 2020 . I hope he won't grow up and say he want to do fadun and grow a beard instead. Any way congratulations to your sister

    ReplyDelete
  2. 21 years?! Haibo! Anna you are killing us! I was about to ask when he turns 18!
    For my not-yet-but-surely-to-be conceived friends daughter who is the best weaver i know.
    The world would be a better place if we all had an aunty like you. Congrats.

    Mvumikazi | Urban Mnguni

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Looolll. It's still shacking Anna, don't mind her.

      Delete
  3. Age is but a number.I have a two year old niece with big natural hair and has got swags and yes,she loves her natural hair.Are we qualified?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Some kids get it straight from the womb. I guess Anna would love to audition her, lol.

      Delete
  4. Hahaha.Please show this post to His mother will you,what is her reaction?

    ReplyDelete
  5. What are you waiting for Ashake,apply now.Im already seeing a long queue,lol.

    ReplyDelete
  6. ANNA OH.... DEPUTY MUM...LOL

    ReplyDelete
  7. See vision 2020. Buhari come and see o.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Eiiiii hahahahahahahahaha talk about tough in-laws

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Looolll. I guess she will calm down later.

      Delete
    2. This sounds so serious.
      When that time comes, we shall cross the bridge.

      Delete
  9. Don't mind her,Dimena(Dimeji&Anna) go and do your own work o

    ReplyDelete

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