The Struggle

Do I need an introduction? I guess not.

All you need to know about me is that I have a boring life. Very boring.

I need a challenge (+ plus I was living in the northern part of the country, have you heard of the sun? #enoughSaid)

So, I cut my hair and decided to be natural. It was so much fun because I poured water everyday, no more weaves. I was free!


The combing. Washing. Co-washing. Looking for the right products. Sectioning(?), doing your hair yourself, appropriate natural hair styles for occasions, the pulling out because you just can't keep your hands off your hair. 

Oh the struggle. 

Don't get me wrong oh, I enjoy the struggle, I enjoy watching my hair go from drab to fab by just spraying water.... Beautiful.

But a struggle is a struggle, whether it is enjoyed or not. I mean who are we kiddin? 

I mentioned how my life is boring earlier right? So, basically there is no motivation to always "do" my hair, well except the constant nagging from my mum about how crazy my hair looks. Who else gets that? *sigh* 

Am I the only not-so-religious-hair-product-user? Anyone else? Yes? No? *cricket*

I watch my sister spray leave-in, oil, wash, co-wash and all of that religiously and yours faithfully just dorns a cap and off I go..

Like who else does that? Anyone? aha! I knew it, I am the only product-lazy naturalista out there. 

This struggle must end.

I gave myself another challenge to write here, so at least I would have a reason to take care of my hair (properly) like I always read.

I'm ashamed, but I figured if I want to come her more often I have to air my bad habits first right? I thought so too. 
Seriously speaking now, everyone just goes on YouTube, post videos and go on blogs and post videos and pictures of very shinny, well behaved kinky hair. Where is the "bad" and "ugly" part? The everyday struggle? The day your hair broke the comb? How you can't keep your hands off pulling off your ends? How badly that product/combination of products smell but you use it anyways? 

I have good days too - rubber bands, hair bands, oil, gel, leave-in later I come out looking fab and I love it.

There is a struggle, its not always sunshine and smiles. Let's embrace that too! 


  1. I embrace the struggle too, LOL...

    Nice writing :)

  2. lol, no one wants to see ugly hair on YT. People go online to find hair inspirations and get educated. Btw, if your hair breaks a comb, it means you probably combed it dry or was forcing the comb on the hair, which is a big NO NO! Natural hair isn't suppose to be a struggle, although some hair will be more difficult to handle than others. My hair for example doesn't achieve most of the styles you see on YT, so I just do my own thing. I'll advice you to do the same.

    1. Thats the point, it misleads people they dont know what they are signing up for when they decide to go natural, you said its not a struggle??

      hmmm...... Okay. if you say so. I've educated myself enough and no my hair doesnt break a comb, there are people out there that have comb-breaking hair. was just saying


  3. my long lost sister! I have found you! lol. I too struggle, I too am a not-so-religious-hair-product-user...I haven't even had my hair for that long and I've broken about 3 combs already! thanks for the lovely post!

    1. LOL! I honestly thought i was the only one oh. *hi 5*
      Ah!! 3 combs? Pls be conditioning oh, its bad enough you have to run a comb through, atleast lets make it abit less painful. Pele

  4. Okay, my hair doesn't break combs....but the struggle to find what to do to it is killing. I have had to wear wigs for the past 3 months because I just do shuku cornrows and didi every two weeks after my bi-monthly routine of shampooing, hot oil treatment and conditioners...

  5. Lol I feel her struggle. People ask me all the time why I am natural. And then I always struggle with the rituals and all. Right now my hair is in a protective style and I am loving it.

  6. we all struggle, anyone that says they don't is lying. you get tired of taking care of the hair, and if you are a broke ass student, and you do not have money to replenish your supply, much worse. meaning you just have to manage with only water which we all know isn't always enough. thankfully wigs and protective hairstyles and scarves help to mask the bad hair days. you just keep struggling till you get it right and just keep doing.

  7. Going au naturals is a lifestyle choice, it cannot be a fashion statement otherwise you won’t last. I’ve had natural hair for some years now and I’ve had my ups and downs (for example, my hair doesn’t grow much at all). But that’s because I haven’t always put in the effort to really take care of it or use the right products. Now I no longer put chemicals in my hair, I try to use products with high—and best of all, I have a routine like most of you on here. It’s a lot of work, but the struggle is part of the journey and fun! I love the feel of my nappy roots—won’t trade it for anything else. Anywhoo, you can read up on all my hair drama and all things Naij at (Twitter: @omonaij).

  8. Hmmm very interesting write up. Where do I start?

    Are you saying you did not struggle when your hair was relaxed? Are you saying you ALWAYS knew what to do and ALWAYS had the hairstyle come out looking fab? Hmmmmm. I think this is all from wrong / false expectations about natural hair. And unfortunately we have a society and salon culture that, at the moment, is "new" and "inexperienced" when it comes to natural hair. I have had natural hair for a long time and had relaxed hair for a longer time. Trust me, in both lives I have / had good and bad hair days. Periods of the saaaaaaame hairstyle and periods when I just did not know what to do or honestly I just did not WANT to be bothered to do anything to my hair.

    And so what if I ALWAYS wear twists or braids or a wig or an Afro puff? So what? Sometimes this variety thing is overrated and binds you up instead of freeing you.

    Are you telling me the YT videos of women with relaxed hair show their struggles or that they tried to do the style 4 times before it finally came out well? That's media and images! Honestly who wants to watch a video of someone always falling down? Nobody! Because we all fall down. We want to see people triumph and get back up and win and we want to see beautiful people and happy people so that we say to ourselves "I can be a winner too. I can be beautiful too. I can be happy too."

    So whose fault is this? Mine? Or yours? Or are we both to blame?

    1. This is not a compare and contrast natural hair versus relaxed haiR, NOBODY is talking about relaxed hair here, so this is not even a basis for comparism at all.


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